Thursday, December 2, 2010

RIP: Four Loco


            Four Loco is an alcoholic malt beverage mixed with an energy drink. For those who enjoy Red Bulls and vodka and other variations of energy drink and alcohol, Four Loco seems like the perfect solution for those not wanting to take the effort to mix the two together. Unfortunately, you can’t find Four Loco on store shelves anymore. Thanks to the Federal Government and Chuck “The Schmuck” Schumer this product has been effectively banned from being sold.

            Schumer and other busy body politicians cited the health risk of mixing a stimulant and depressant together. Unless you are a drooling idiot, you know the risk. I’m sure the college students and other young people who drank this drink were well aware of the health risks involved but did it anyway. Why? Because they enjoyed it. They, within the market system, voted with their feet and pocketbooks to purchase this drink for consumption. They knew the risks but thought the benefits outweighed the hazard. Free commerce in society is human nature. You want a product because you either want it or need it. Someone with the product you desire has a need for money. So, you give the person your money and in exchange you get the product. It is how civilizations are built and people survive. Any violation of this, such as the ban on Four Loco, is a direct attack on human nature. It can be clearly stated, Chuck Schumer is anti-human. (That would make an awesome slogan for a sign in a future Anti-Schumer rally.)

            Aren’t caffeine and alcohol legal? As my last trip to the supermarket testifies, they are both legal and prominently sold. How can you ban the sale of a drink that mixes two perfectly legal products together? You can still get Irish Coffee or Red Bull and Vodka at any respectable bar. Why aren’t those two drinks illegal? Why is the government banning one alcoholic energy drink and not other similar products? The answer is simple: they are the government and every edict they give is sacred writ and any questioning of its word is blasphemy in the church of the State.

            How did Chuck Schumer make Four Loco illegal? It wasn’t done through a bill through Congress or a government lawsuit against the makers of Four Loco. No, Chuck the Schmuck wanted it banned like the good government nanny that he is. He made a few phone calls threatening the company, had a few press conferences slamming the drink and viola! It was done. Due to the threat of government force, the manufacturer pulled the product for fear of the holy sepulcher of the State from D.C. causing even more money to be lost.  

            This ban on Four Loco is indicative of a much graver problem facing our nation. From Joe Biden mandating BP to create a government slush fund after the oil spill to Joe Lieberman demanding Amazon stop hosting Wikileaks on its servers the banning of Four Loco is another example of politicians acting outside the limits of the Constitution by making private companies bend to their will; setting themselves up as petty dictators.

            Under the Constitution, the government cannot take away your property without a lawsuit, due process of law or just compensation. For example, the government couldn’t just decide to take away your computer for no reason without a lawsuit in front of a jury, paying you for it or a combination of the two. Since the current government has absolutely no respect for the Constitution, they have decided to take away your property at the behest of chicken necked dictators in Washington. Private property is what sets apart prosperous nations from poverty stricken hellholes. Whenever the government decides it has a stake in your property, as is the case in the former Soviet Union, only tyranny and poverty ensue. As your body is your private property, banning what goes into it is a violation of property rights. Any action made by government against that principle is a threat to both its people and to itself.

            The ban of an alcoholic drink may seem insignificant compared to the myriad problems destroying this nation from the inside out. But it shows the government is not afraid to use the Constitution as toilet paper while rearing its head into even the smallest aspects of your life. If it is not afraid to ban something as insignificant as Four Loco it won’t think twice about violating the things that matter. With the recent passage of the supposed Food Safety Bill and TSA agents having hand sex with travelers, our government has been violating our rights with a brazenness reserved for gangsters. We have been treated as chattel slaves and the government is not afraid to act like a slave driver. We are not slaves but a free people. It is time we stood up to this government that thinks the Constitution is just a piece of paper. We want to control the destiny of our lives. We know what is best for us and the government does not.

            Anyone reading this should send the government a message. Keep your hands off my Four Loco and give me back my freedom!

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